Am I nuts or what?

Let me explain, I live 2 lives, 2 wardrobes, 2 lifestyles only because I am not out at work also there are two of us in one body, crazy as it sounds it's true.

Well anyhow, Shauna wants to do more things to familiarize herself with everyday life and I being the gentleman that I am I have let her try. Now the fun begins if you want to call it that, like letting her shave my chin from the cluster of 5 hairs that always wants to grow there like a turf that won't die. So she lathers up and wham, nearly cuts of my chin and blood is dripping down my neck which I had to take the razor from her, my throat is more important and we can't afford any mistakes there. LOL.

So on the way home I usually fly and CRAWL down the highway but wait Shawn, Shauna wishes to drive. What usually takes an hour turn into a series of turns, tears and 2 1/2 hours later I found her back on the highway emotionally drained which I took the wheel while she collected herself. She needs to learn directions and be defensive especially driving in Chicago construction sites.


After getting off of work yesterday, this is the best now wait for it, Shauna wants a shower which is fine. I know she would prefer a bath but the tub is 5 foot and she is 8 inches taller.
So after the shower and attempting to cut our head off at the chin, applying body oil and feeling wonderful she grabs a tube of Body Bling. Now as you all know I have no idea what you women like on your skin, your perfume and such.

Shauna has this body bling cream and squeezes some of that warm creamy lotion on the skin and turned us BRONZE and shiny, OMG now what! I have a meeting in the morning and I look like a freaking statue with glitter.

Back to the shower I run, body oil is fine no body cream with glitter and she will not be shaving anytime soon. I think I will lend her my GPS, hate to see her upset going to the mall.

Shauna is the best, so she deserves the best I have to offer.