Who is speaking to who?

I left my side work which I am helping a company with their network but I left later than expected, I didn't have my speech or had I applied my face like I wanted to. All was not right, I wanted to change out of my work clothes and wear something nice for them, instead I showed up like a half woman and half man so embarrassing.
The weather sure doesn't seem to agree with me lately, today it was raining and by god I get chilled easily because of the changes the hormone is putting me through.
I sat in my truck for a good ten minutes checking out the area because I don't usually travel by myself, why is because of the physiological trauma I went through years ago and can not shake it.
Andy was nothing like I expected him to be, I envisioned a small skinny guy with glasses which turned out a very tall young man who intimidated me when I passed him to go to the building.

He actually frighten me because I was alone outside in an area I am only used to in the day time.

After I arrived I inquired of the person whom asked me to be the speaker which his name was Andy, there sat mostly guys and one very cute young lady, why only one showed up to see me was more than I would have asked for. As the weather wasn't something I would have wanted to go out in either. The young lady was pretty and very quiet at first, maybe she wasn't sure of me but she would ask some really good questions later on. I was actually quite cold and the guys they did not seem to noticed the temperature difference. I asked where Andy was and everyone said he was smoking outside, I did know what he looked like but he figured out by my truck who I was :)

Yes I push my gender in the faces that drive behind me, with my rainbow sticker, I love lesbians and lest not forget my huge trans logo.
Maybe I am asking for trouble but I don't feel that way, I am expressing what I bottled up for so long. Yes I am proud of who I am, and if people don't like it, well I am not going back into my closet to hide just to please others.

So I introduced myself, he smiled and said 'I knew who you were by the truck' and shook my hand so gently I caught myself from shedding a tear, after all this young man had scared me. So inside we went and I re introduced myself and the first young man 'Pocha' tried to make me comfortable as possible with getting me a chair, I told him that he was kind but I sat by the young lady, the hospitality was fantastic.

Apparently all the boys and girls weren't going to make it, since the weather was yucky with rain making ice and all. I had seven or 8 young men and one young lady, who wanted to meet me like I were someone special.

It isn't everyday you see someone like me, someone who can walk in between genders who claims he is a woman dressed partially like a man. I feel like Shane from the L word, a rebel if you will who doesn't care what people think as long as I am happy.

So here I was without my speech and I just sat there a bit and Andy suggested that I start from the beginning, how I came to be who I am today. So you know the story to that and then I answered questions which weren't bad, I felt like I fit it and these young adults knew more than I did when it came to how society reacted to the LGBT. I felt like I should have been in the other chairs asking the questions :(

Questions that were asked were as follows:

How did I know I was Intersex?
Did I feel different than anyone else and what did I do to overcome it?
After discovering what I was as in Intersex why didn't I become a girl then?
Why did my father keep me as a boy and not let me be a girl?
When did I start my transition, the first time and why didn't I follow through?
After being told you were Intersex was it difficult to find information growing up?
What complications did you experience growing up and now?
What is dating like? Male or female?
When did I inform the person I was Intersex, right away, a couple dates or ?
Did I decide to follow through for my surgery and did I have a set date?
How did I know I was different than my brothers?
Do I have plans on getting artificial implants? Any other changes?
Why wouldn't I take the estrogen shots when they were suggested.
I was asked what were the bad effects being Intersex, that I was sterile at birth and fertile as a female.

We discussed hormones, therapy and changes my body has gone through. I explained what made me Intersex the ovary and uterus and since I couldn't provide evidence showing what was inside me I wasn't about to become a project for anyone.

With what I have lived with my whole life I have fought to be who I am, so they each asked questions regarding my growing up and the difficulties I had endured which I told the story I have told a hundred times. My being different than them wasn't something they could see, you would have to live in my shoes to know what it was like. How in the navy someone found out and took advantage of me, I explained how I was frighten when I walked in that it haunts me to this day. The complications of the ovary and how it had made me so ill these last few years, my pre menopause at the age of 45. But all in all the speaking to them was great, I have learned alot from those teens.
I plan on having another get together later in 2009, with all the plans of the Denver Rush, Be-All and Southern Comfort Conference and the 2009 Gala I will be a very busy woman next year but I will find time for them.

So that was my education with those fine young people and the young lady even gave me pointers to an Intersex group which I have looked up since then.

Oh to be young again.....